Birth Story, Part 2

Sorry for the wait. I have two reasons why I haven't written yet.

1. I feel like I'm going to sound a bit like a Sweet 16 girl on MTV where daddy's little girl gets a BMW for her birthday but she's all upset that she didn't get a huge party with it, i.e., I got the baby but not the experience I wanted. That's not the case, I am totally grateful for my healthy baby, but if written wrongly or read in the wrong mood, it might sound that way, so I've been reluctant to share.

2. It's taken a while to get to the point where I can write it because it still makes me sad to think about it. Sounds dramatic I know, esp because to some this birth experience would be no big deal. I'll try to make more sense of it to you at the end.

More of the story

Friday morning I woke with contractions. They were regular, and probably every 10 minutes, but really mild. I had a strong feeling he'd be coming that day, but not right away, so I went to Kaiser for a "routine fetal monitoring." Something my dr said I'd have to do "twice" in her serious tone (still trying to convince me making it sound like a big hassle). My friend told me how when she went in for that it was a little traumatic because they scared her making it sound like things were a big deal when they ended up not being. She said she was there for a couple of hours and crying. I was so glad she'd told me that beforehand so I knew that was a possibility. I guess that's part of why I'm going to share my story, in case any of you have a similar one hit you and if this helps you mentally prepare. That said, I expected nothing to go wrong, esp since I'd just gone in for my visit two days earlier.

It was a little uncomfortable driving due to the contractions that were getting closer but figured it would only be 20 minutes and I could come back home to labor for real. I was glad my appt was at 9am because my sister had to leave for the airport at 11:30 to go back to Utah. I was planning to take her to the car shop on the way to the airport because her car broke down while she was here and she had to go sign some papers to kiss her car goodbye.

I got to my appointment at 9am and they asked if I'd eaten in the past 30 minutes. Nobody had told me to do this, but I'd eaten just about 30 min ago, so they said that should be fine, food just helps the baby get moving. Oh great I was thinking, this kid sleeps every morning, I wish I'd known what this was all about and I would have scheduled it for the afternoon.

So I sit down in a cushy little chair, grabbed a Hypnobirthing book my friend dropped off the night before, and then a nice technician strapped the monitors on. She said his heart rate should be between 110-160 and he was a steady 160. All too steady apparently. She said they wanted to see his heart rate go up and down to show that he's moving and active. I told her he was always still in the mornings, so she gave me some juice and a cracker, put a little vibrator thing on my stomach for a few seconds, but he stayed steady. At first I thought

Time was a tickin and the contractions were now between 3-5 min apart, I can't remember which (I wish I'd kept the print out!), but they were even. They were still mild, but I was getting nervous about driving myself home even though I live close. I also needed to get home to get my sister to the airport, but obviously I wasn't up to driving her at this point, so I had texted a friend asking if she could. I also texted another friend asking if she could come over and help out with my kids for the next couple of hours once I got home since I figured I'd be in labor (didn't think it would be serious labor for a while).

I told the tech that my contractions were picking up and wondered how long this would take. She looked at them and assured me they weren't real contractions, real ones would have to be 1. very painful, 2. Much higher "hills" on the monitoring chart and 3., can't remember and don't care, but intuition and experience weren't on her list. Then she left.

I flipped through the book some more and skipped to the important parts trying to cram for any last minute tips on getting through the nasty parts. I read about the "rainbow" technique where you visualize you're in a field laying on a foot and a half of mist. You first visualize it's strawberry colored, slowly drifting over your head, relaxing your head, then your shoulders, arms, etc., relaxing every part of you that it touches. Then you do it again in orange, then yellow, etc. It was actually really relaxing, but then I was brought back to reality and noticed the time ticking away. I sort of shoved my stomach around with some jiggling trying to get that kid to move and hallelujah, he moved! The tech was happy with that, but needed him to move twice before she could let me go.

Josh was at work, so I called him and let him know what was going on. I guess I didn't explain that I really thought I was in (pre) labor because he said something about wondering if I should wait to use my friends until I really needed them. I was irritated because I knew what I was feeling and knew I'd need help, but poor Josh didn't know what I was feeling contraction/labor wise. When I talked to him later he had no idea what was going on with the contractions and how quickly things were happening. I realized I had been trying to be quiet and quick in what I said to him so the tech lady wouldn't hear me, oops. So that added to my beginning annoyed mood of feeling like people weren't listening (even if that wasn't his fault and just a mis-communication, I didn't take time to consider that in my increasingly anxious mind).

My tech came back and I told her that I have two kids (trying to let her know that I knew what real contractions were in a nice way), she didn't know that. I told her I thought I was in labor and was nervous that I wouldn't be able to drive home if I didn't leave soon and also my sister was leaving for the airport soon and needed to get home to stay with my kids, etc. I asked her if I could just leave (why did I ask?) and come back tomorrow if I didn't have the baby that day.

Somewhere in that conversation she said something about them not being real contractions again but either way I told her I needed to get going. She said she'd go ask the doctor to look at his chart and see if it was good enough for her with just his one movement. She came back in with the doctor and the doctor told me I needed to go to labor and delivery.

And sorry to drop off again, but the baby is in need and then we're off to get my sister at the airport (she's back! but just for a couple of days before my mom and her take off for a road trip). Final installment soon...