Have you seen the "What Would You Do?" show? It's got to be one of my favorites and I always think, "Oh, I'd totally do xyz/tell/ask them..." But would I?
I had this question racing through my mind the other night as I went to Kroger to pick up some milk with Hazel. It was about 8:20 when I left (sorry Hazel), still light out, but not a lot of people shopping so there were plenty of parking spaces. As I was unloading my cart, I noticed a man in a ginormous truck (it was like 150% bigger than a regular Chevy) stopping in front of the spot, get out, move a cart out of the way, and get back in. I couldn't figure out what he was doing, he couldn't possibly be going through that trouble to take the pregnant lady spot when there are open ones a few spots away. But he was, and he backed that thing up right into it.
I stared and half smiled at him to be sure he knew someone was watching--but really, that wasn't going to do anything and I couldn't really feel like I did my civic duty by a "knowing look."
I probably shouldn't let my heart race over something like this, but I feel bound to do things about stuff that bothers me--like calling 911 if I see a swerving driver or when I saw an oven in the middle of the road (my mom taught me how to call 911 and just tell them immediately that it's not an emergency but...). Anyway, so I decide to write him a little note that went something like this:
"Hi Sir,
I didn't want to say anything because you looked like a nice man, but having been pregnant twice before, I felt like I should. The store reserves spots for women in need to be as close to the store as possible and having been there, I know how nice this is. Please be more considerate of women in the future.
Thanks, A been-there mom."
The first time I was pregnant I sort of thought pregnant women shouldn't get quite the deluxe treatment we were offered. My real trouble was when I had morning sickness and people couldn't see that, so just having a big belly didn't seem to warrant special care. I tried to walk 3-4 miles a day (if my bladder would make it, sometimes we'd have to stop at the church which is half way). What's the big deal walking a little farther?
Until baby #2. When I was pregnant, I was a regular at Kroger because they have a few designated "Expecting Mommy" spots that were great when I had to lug a non walking to walking but not easy to reign in baby/toddler to the store with my queasiness and expanding belly and shrinking bladder. It was all harder with baby #2, because of worrying about lugging around toddler #1 and being just plain exhausted. I'm now an advocate of that special treatment, at least for moms with additional kids. Side note: I remember so many people offering me their seat on a very crowded rush-hour subway bus but I graciously declined most of the time because I'd been sitting all day, but still, the gestures are always nice.
I found several opinions on the web about this, mostly anti-sign and treatment. Here is one of my favorites http://www.feministmormonhousewives.org/?p=329, esp comment #4.
So, tell me this:
Question #1: Would you have said or done anything, if so, what?
Question #2: Do you think pregnant women deserve extra special treatment?
Question #3: Is there a group that deserves special treatment that doesn't?
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Post Comment:
I'm a huge fan of blogs now! I have wanted to ask more people from all over what they think about things, so this is fun! I appreciate the comments and different perspectives. I want to be clear first that I think exercise is good for most pregnant women, but it's the activity that is involved here. Pushing around a large cart of stuff is just annoying when you have a big belly and low energy, so it was more just a great courtesy that I appreciated when I felt like I was going to burst. And like I said, it meant a lot more when I had a toddler to carry around as well, now I just try to find a spot next to a cart so I can plop them in there before Hazel runs away.
