How are you?

Chances are, you've been asked this in passing by someone else, and you've probably said "Fine, thanks" or "Good, how are you?" as you hurry off to somewhere. Hopefully that's not always the case as there are more appropriate times to have a real "How are you?" discussion than on your way to change a crying, dirty-diapered kid or are late for an appointment when you just saw someone you know at the grocery store.

While it sounds nice to show interest in a person, this scenario used to irk me to no end at one point in my life. I used to think about this everytime someone would ask me this for a spell in both high school and college. There were times when I just really wanted to say, "Terrible actually, I'm having an awful day and I really just need to talk to someone. Have a minute?" But the body language of the asker clearly stated that this really was just a greeting, not a question.

I've fallen in the trap myself, it's nice to say something right? But since this awakening period I had :), I've at least tried to really consider when I say it and make sure I mean it. That means, if I ask it and I have that crying kid on my hip, that I'll have to figure out a way to still talk if the answer from my friend or the cashier ends up being, "Terrible actually." While I'm sure it doesn't look this way, as I'm hurrying off to somewhere, I'm guessing this is the case with most people, that if I really said, "terrible," I'd have someone there to talk to--either because they care or because they'd feel really stupid, awkward, and/or bad if they said, "oh too bad, see you later!" Either way, I could probably complain a little.

There have actually been a few times when I've answered negatively to the "How are you?" question but I don't trap the person into sticking around and talking and usually try to excuse myself because wouldn't it be lying to say, "Good?"

I was totally stressed out the other day when coming home from some errands and my sweet neighbor asked how I was doing. I felt like I had a tornado in my head and she was just out watering plants with her elderly gma sitting there smiling (she doesn't speak English so we just smile and say hi). Again, what to say? I wanted to rip my hair out and someone elses, but I wasn't going to tell her that or she might be scared of us. So instead of giving a faulty answer, I just said, "Ohh, busy!!! But hopefully things will slow down soon." And then since I knew I didn't have time to really sit and talk with her, I think I just asked something about her mom and how nice it was to see them enjoying the outdoors.

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What promted this pet peeve thought of mine was this video where Ann Curry is reporting on the shootings of possibly 13 people shot and more wounded and opening up with, "Good Morning." ? Seriously? I mean maybe I'm having a good morning, but that's your opening line for this story? I wish I were more creative to come up with more original greetings because I couldn't think of a good one for Ann even though I didn't think hers was appropriate.

Q: Do you think about what you're asking people when you say "How are you?"
Q: Do you care that others ask it when they really seem to not care? (You know, like when they say it as they're walking away and they're out the door as they finish it)
Q: Do you have more creative greetings you use that don't make you feel a little insincere if you don't have the time (or if just don't care)?
Q: Does it annoy you if TV people use greetings like this to break serious stories?
Q: Oh, and How are you? :) Emails are always easier with this q because you really can respond with care:).