Oh, and this isn't their phone, but it is an Amish phone.
I'm from Ohio, and no, not from Amish country despite the description of "the sticks" Josh likes to refer to--although it is beautiful. Erma's family are friends with my family from a connection that happened years ago. I'm probably way off on the details, so here's my general understanding of how we connected.
My parents lived in Ohio ages ago and were near Amish country when they saw an older Amish man down town smoking. They struck up a conversation with him and he asked them if they would drive him home and in return for the favor and the secrecy of his smoking habit, he would give them a full tour of his home and lifestyle. They took it and thus begun the friendship.
Side note: my grandpa's family is Amish, but there was a break somewhere in the line where someone, I don't know how to put it, but stopped being Amish. A while ago they tried to have a family reunion of both the Amish side and non-Amish. I didn't hear how it went, but I would have loved to have been there! --They were from IL, so unrelated.
In youth, the Amish kids get a chance to go out in the world and do something fun, these Yoder boys went on a hunting trip with my cousins and uncle in Utah (can you imagine a buggy ride that long? No, they didn't do that, but can you imagine?). So when we had a family reunion in Ohio one year, the Amish new a lot of our family and extended family and we had a huge feast at the Amish's house. It was good.
I loved seeing their way of life and felt this small sense of priviledge and good fortune that I was able to see such an intimate view of a private life. They took us for buggy rides, pet their pet leapord (no joke), fed their deer (also pets) and got a tour of his harness shop.
It had been a while since I'd been out to visit them (3 hours from parents), but last year I took Josh there even though I honestly couldn't remember what they looked like or what their names were besides a stereotypical guess. Oh, right, the Yoders! Is it shameful to say I just wanted to keep the friendship alive because it is such an unusual one?
We went to the mom's house first and she actually had us drive her to Erma's house which was 3 miles away. I can only imagine that they're grateful when someone shows up with a car since they can accept rides so she didn't have to drive the buggy for 40 minutes over big hills to see her daughter, and back.
(Please excuse how corny this terrifying image is. Again, can you imagine? My imagination is way too good for this kind of thing to not make me nervous.)
Ends up Erma and I have a lot in common. We're almost the same age as well as our first children (a few days apart)--her's Heidi, mine Hazel. They played in her dark front room with some very modern Fisher Price toys. What happened to the old wooden spoon and crate to bang on? Don't Amish kids just play with dolls without faces? We were both expecting our second girls, same due date.Surprisingly we had a lot to talk about and relate with each other. It was really cool. She and her husband have a phone they can use in his shop, but you can only leave messages on it and she'll have to call you back since they aren't in there much. I've only talked to her once this past year so I was surpised to get a call from her while scrubbing down the house last week.
It was really fun to hear from her, but after the initial hello's and how are you's, I was stumped at what to talk about. What is kosher, or Amish-acceptable, to talk about? Can't really talk about the latest movies or books. I wasn't even sure if it was okay to ask if their home selling process was like ours (they just moved). I think it was a little hard for both of us to know how to have a conversation at first since we really don't know each other and seriously, she's Amish, what could I talk about with her?
Finally we connected on kids, and then I realized how similar we were. Even though our cultures are pretty different (although thankfully my own religion has helped me have similar moral standards to understand the basis of hers), as women we are similar. We had a great time talking about our daughter's personalities, their births (she had a c-section), and the usual bickering between two little ones and any good ideas on curbing it. She even brought up the octo-mom, no idea how she'd heard about that.
It was really cool to cross over our differences into such a familiar territory. I've found that when I've travelled and have managed to get past language and cultural barriers, even a little, it's really exciting to connect with someone so outwardly different and realize that we're all really just human and ultimately children of God.
We talked for over an hour when we started wrapping up and she said she needed to get back to the house because her kids were probably awake then. I'd totally forgotten she was just sitting in some room with a phone this whole time. I couldn't help but wonder what she thinks of me and the outside world who must appear (and partially true) to be so worldly. Or did she enjoy that outlet of talking to me?
Q: So what would YOU talk to an Amish person about?
Q: Any thoughts on what you think they think of us?
Q: Have you talked to Amish people before or have any Amish friends?
3 comments:
How interesting! I never knew you had any Amish connections... how come I never heard of about this?
That is so amazing! I know in general they want to be left alone so they don't feel like spectacles.
I'll have to give it some thought as to what I would talk with her about, but probably find some commonalities just as you did.
As far as what they think of us: I know they are a very peaceful people and that they don't think taht everyone should be Amish. That they are just supposed to be separated from the world. I could only imagine it is similar to how Latter-day Saints view people more worldly than themselves. They don't (or shouldn't) think poorly of them. Just that they do not have the same priorities and understanding as themselves.
this was such a great and interesting post, afton! i actually think it would be refreshing to hide from the world for a while . . . but i don't think i'm converting to amishism. :) hee hee.
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